Keeping Your Marriage Vows and Avoid Divorce

The Unbreakable, Inviolable, Biblical Marriage Covenant

Considerations and critique of common biblical Divorce “Exemption” Clauses and Adultery

Keeping Your Marriage Vows…. By Saanichton Ministries

Preface:

Marriage and family are beautiful and precious institutions God has created and decreed since Genesis. One way we can “divorce proof” family is to clearly understand that there is not an option to divorce. We are a liberty to reshape or thinking on this based on scripture. Functional and strong marriage and family are well worth the fight.

We collectively need to do everything possible to push back from horrible trends which would seek to splinter this most wonderful order of creation. In order to do this, we will need to address difficult problems as well as common misconceptions. This may be difficult at first but will pay dividends in the long run. The desire of this book report is happy families with a solid monogamous understanding.

Divorce and the ensuing remarriage represent the ultimate quagmire.

While perhaps a sweet proposition at first glance, the choice to divorce and engage in remarriage adultery is a fundamental moral failure. This has created untold division, animosity and disorder in the church our secular communities alike.

Families all around are continually being splintered and crushed by divorce, and yet we don’t talk about it. But as always, we can trust in God’s Word for guidance. His Word provides both the answers to the problem, as well as solutions.

This topic requires serious Spirit lead focus. Controversy about marriage is not to be undermined as political or legalistic. We can read God’s word directly for ourselves. We are free indeed to do this.

Also, we are to never draw conclusions on this thorny divorce issue (or any other) based on our human ideology, or religious indoctrination, but purely on Scripture which is authoritative and crystal clear.

It is noteworthy that church leaders in the mainstream have compromised on many issues including the God ordained roles of men and women, females speaking/leading in the church, “church boards” rather than elders in order to navigate around biblical requirements and so on. In some circles, they allow homosexual marriage rights for same sex couples, and other perverse liberalism.

While we can all accept this topic of divorce as barely a palliative study, we should not be reluctant when confronting the age-old, polarizing issue. This is a sin we can see very close up. Perhaps we or someone close are in the middle or it. But we cannot passively navigate around this issue because we rather not go there. Together, students of the bible must not ignore the subject or conclude it as amorphous. Christians are never called to a spirit of fear, but of power and of joy.

Therefore we must refrain from reactions of flight or resignation and face up to this subject with boldness and all seriousness. We can leave political correctness, and the fear of offending someone aside.

This crisis of family divorce and adultery needs desperate attention from church leaders. Saints need to be strong and draw clear lines to prevent further family turmoil from spreading like wildfire in the Christian assembly. The family institution as well as the integrity of marriage are so important and must be maintained. We must not tolerate these erroneous, misguided “biblical divorce” loophole teachings. We cannot accept that which would support divorce and adultery any longer.

We do understand what it means to exhume the issue of divorce. The costs may seem too high. Believers must study, consider and speak about difficult things they want to remain resigned to.

Moreover, those closest and whom we love the most, may be the very ones who are in the middle of these terrible divorce/adultery family plights. To understand second marriages as adultery is a troubling and vexing prospect which can cause resentment and bitterness. It can also lead to serious, lasting offence to some we are called to live in peace with. But in the long run, facing up to this issue will help the family and prevent ensuing turmoil. The “sweeping it under the carpet” proverb will only make things worse.

Christians must come to grips with divorce and clearly understand what, and what not, God’s word says on this unspeakably important subject. Our Lord warned us of the cost of obeying the gospel too. Luke 14: 26: 26“If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. 27“Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. Followers of Christ should never seek to gain approval from any religious union rather than approval from God, and loving obedience to the Lord Jesus who gave so much for us.

The paper is certainly without prejudice and is not intended to point fingers or judge any specific family arrangement in our community. Again, we understand that divorce and adultery can and does indeed involve our very own brothers, sisters, mothers and fathers. Adultery affects our very own sons, daughters, and in-laws. It can affect our very selves.

The author has immediate family members experiencing a bitter divorce and remarriage adultery plight at the time of this writing. He was challenged by fellow brethren to reexamine what scripture says about divorce and the two apparent “biblical exemption” clauses. He has concluded “biblical divorce exemption clauses” are absolute false teachings/interpretations of scripture.

Christians are not at liberty to believe whatever they want on this issue, or whatever they may imagine is convenient. The practice if divorce and adultery are way too destructive and unbiblical.

The bible has strong words of judgment against those who sin perpetually with adultery.1 Cor 6: 9Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, 10nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.

Saint Paul lists four different kinds of unique sexual sins to the Corinthian church and says what it says. One can barely comment on it. Christians are saved from these kinds of sexually deviant behaviors. Sanctified believers are never to go back to it for any reason, excuse or preconceived exemption clause. God will judge this sin, not us believers.

Knowing the God of matchless grace, we take comfort in the hope that not all people, remarried, in adultery will necessarily fall unredeemed into eternal damnation.

But many brethren among us intentionally or unintentionally avoid this study altogether. But we must rebuke and reprove this problem in season and out of season while showing love and great patience in accordance with 2 Tim 4:1-5.

If we dare say that God’s word supports a pro-divorce and remarriage choice, we are best to make absolute certain that we have scriptural backing for such a radical and liberal assertion. Instructions to divorce are obviously way out of character of the teachings our Lord Jesus and the New Testament. Why are so many believers so quick to give it a green light? A pro-divorce stance un-checked, could unleash evil, peril and hardship upon families on a scale we could never imagine.

Does God, “look the other way” when couples divorce with or without a good excuse and “remarry” another suitor? Is it a tolerable error to choose to remarry another marital partner in various circumstances? Can abiding grace act as insurance in case we do not get it right on this? Are we free and able define the root of the problem? This book is a respectful attempt to answer these troubling and vexing questions which are much easier to pose than to answer.

This study is certainly not for the faint-hearted. This in-depth examination may change the way we see marriage for the rest of our lives as it has the author. We can rest assured it will be a change for the better!

The popular opinion, “if the other one committed adultery, or happened to leave, it is fine to divorce and remarry” is way too broad of a pathway which leads away from the goodness of gospel truth. It goes against verses such as Romans 12 1: 1Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. Believers should be delighted to suffer for Christ by obedience to God’s word concerning this vital issue of matrimonial bounds. They should never be seduced by any liberal teaching asserting otherwise.

Has the problem been defined?

One large problem we see with remarriage adultery is that it has not been well defined, nor has the ill been diagnosed. Many bible believers understand second or third “marriages” may not look right but fail to understand exactly why. Others may understand it to be somewhat “controversial” at best but remain unsure as to the reason. So, unless we can define the problem clearly, there will be little hope to apply corrective action to prevent the problem from entrenching or repeating itself.

The fact remains young generations are looking for guidance on this subject.

Divorce and remarriage adultery need not be a complex dilemma full of questions. We can understand it crystal clearly. This book is a careful attempt to define and uncover the problem plainly, and therefore, prevent unnecessary ambiguity. The goal and prayer here would be that we ultimately see marriage the way God sees it. One man and one woman bound together for life, in pure, unadulterated monogamy.

Understanding of authentic biblical marriages will also strengthen existing marriages and bounds.